It will be three months on June 28, 2011 that our children have been home from the Ukraine! So much has happened in this time that I am not even sure where to start!
From the very beginning the children seemed to fall into place in our family. I am not sure if this is because they had some time to adjust to us a little over the two weeks we waited for their passports and visa plus the time that we spent on the first trip (it was 28 days).
They were a little quiet the first few hours and were not very excited to see the house. We walked them around and showed them things in the house that they had seen in the video we had brought with us of the house, bedrooms, the house and their brothers. At first they did not even want to look in their rooms. I am not sure they understood that they were for them. After a few hours they would sneak to the rooms and run back to us and ask questions or bring us things to see. By night time they were very excited and happy to go to sleep. Maxim and Sasha wanted to sleep together but we said we would spend time with them until they fell asleep. They all did well and continue to have no problems through the night.
We are amazed at how quickly they are learning English. They already knew words when we arrived back home and their vocabulary increases each and every day. It is easier for Sasha than any of the other children. It progresses in amount know from youngest to oldest. School has been the best learning tool for the younger children. They love school and are so proud to show us what they learned each day. Rey does not like school. He has a hard time with all of the talking and not understanding most of what is being said. He says he feels like all day he hears nothing but “bla, bla, bla” and it is very hard to deal with. Rey and Maxim are only in school for three hours a day and classes are simple things like art, gym, and math (the universal language). We hope that this year would just be for socialization and learning of language because of their late start in the year. We have used many programs online, children’s workbooks for kindergarten through first grade, and children’s reading books like Bearinstein Bears. We used Pimseular Russian to English CD’s for the car, their room and Rey even has them on his MP3 player. The best learning tool that all the children like and agree on using is the Rosetta Stone English program for the computer. It really is worth the money.
It is amazing at how many things still stop them in their tracks when they see them. Airplanes, Semi trucks, animals of almost any kind. They say that the animals that they have in the Ukraine are almost gone, they very rarely see any. Women driving buses and trucks get a lot of attention too. We never had any problems with taking them shopping or any other place with large crowds. We read several articles and books that mentioned this as being a big problem; we think it just depends on the child and their past experiences. They are very shy around strangers still. I do not mind, it is a lot better than having no fears and worrying about them staying with us in public.
Doctors appointments went well. The children are all healthy as we were told. The children did very well and even tried to ask questions. We had a translator come with us so they understood what was being said and so the doctor could ask specific questions to the older children. Next week are dental cleanings. This seems to be the one they are scared of. We will see how it goes.
Each child has jobs that must be done each day. They were so used to having something to do every second of their day while in the orphanage they get bored very quickly and will start to argue with each other. They are not very good at playing by themselves. Every toy we buy ends up on a shelf and the watch it to make sure no one takes it. We have to get the toy and play with it to make them want to do what we are doing and then the next time they do not want to play without us. With the passing of time this is getting better.
The children are very eager to try anything. Sasha was angry because we would not let her drive the big farm tractors that we use to plow fields. Papa gave in and she was just as good as the “big boys”. They have swimming down to a science already, riding bikes, and flips on the trampoline. They must have built 20 bird houses out of every scrap piece of wood they could find on the farm the first two weeks they were home. They had to hang each of them up by themselves with no help. We did give a few away as gifts. They planted a garden so “they do not have to go the store everyday”. They want to do whatever we are doing from laundry and dishes to mowing grass and planting flowers. We are very busy just trying to find new things for them to try.
I do not want everyone to think life is perfect, it is a lot of work and there are troubles but we have not found anything to be too much to handle. Most things have to do with cultural differences and lack of communication because of the language barrier. We have also learned that all words do not translate or translate in the same way that we use them. For example we tell Sasha she is silly all the time. When Rey looked silly up in the Russian to English dictionary it met retarded/ unable to be taught. Of course he told Sasha and needless to say the rest of the night was not a good one. Some other examples are pushing in lines at stores, taking things from other children (the biggest/ strongest get things in the orphanage), oldest child get things first, wanting everything in the store because people who adopt are rich. Like I said nothing too hard to deal with. After a few times of saying no they learn fast what you will and will not accept as good behavior.
We are a little tired but very happy. As I look back on all of the work in the past year to get our children home and our children that were at home prepared for their new siblings I would not for even the slightest second change anything. I cannot imagine life without them.
